jack busch

See that picture? That’s Silas. He’s my five year old, 22 pound, snorting, sniffling, drooling, panting black pug. And in the few years since I’ve been in charge of him, I’ve done an immense amount of growing up. How can such a dainty little nugget of an animal make anyone more manly? (Believe me, I don’t feel particularly macho when I walk this little guy down the street.) It’s not about the size of the dog in the household, it’s the scope of the responsibility that falls upon the dog owner. And while this wee dapper doggy may look refined, he’s much more high maintenance than you’d think. Co-existing with the little bugger has required more sacrifice, patience and maturity than I ever thought I’d have to muster before becoming a parent. What follows are a few important ways that owning a dog can make anyone a better man.

1. Squeamishness Be Gone
2. Routine, Routine, Routine
3. Letting Go of Selfishness
4. The Virtue of Patience
5. Stand By Your Man(’s Best Friend)
6. Asking for Favors
7. Taking Responsibility
8. Coping with Mortality
9. Becoming the Alpha Dog

Squeamishness Be Gone

Congratulations! As a dog owner, you’ve just brought a permanent and prolific source of feces, vomit, drool, hair, anal gland leakage (you’ll see…), urine and sometimes even blood into your home. If encountering a fragrant, auburn steamer coiled on your pillow sets your overly sensitive gag reflex off, then you’ve got some manning up to do. Luckily, as a dog owner, you don’t have a choice. Grab some paper towels, roll them sleeves up and get down to “business.”

Routine, Routine, Routine

On any given Friday, it’s a bachelor’s prerogative to wake up at 8:55AM, punch in at 9:01AM, punch out at 4:59PM and have the first shot down by 5:15PM. Then, roll back in at 2 or 3 or 4 in the morning, crash on the couch and sleep like a hungover stone until 5PM. Try that with a pooch in your apartment and you’re going to have some urine stains to deal with. Now, owning a dog isn’t quite the same as basing your entire schedule around your kid’s soccer practice. But it does mean that you’re going to have to drag your ass out of bed ten minutes early to stand out in the rain with Fido while he finds a perfect spot to mark his territory every morning. And you’ll have to do it again at least two more times a day before you pass out for the night. Don’t worry, though.Sucking it up and being responsible when you least want to be is worth it. It builds character.

Read the rest on Primer Magazine.