Author Archives: Jack

1.  At the Panera at The Mills mall, they have individually-wrapped, wooden coffee stirrers. Just another way we willfully insulate ourselves from each other. 2. Driving with your windows open is a somewhat risky affair. Throughout high school, I was always afraid that someone was going to drive by and throw a half-melted slushy into [...]

1. Tonight, against my will, Wife brought me to see a man walk across a highwire stretched across the Allegheny River. He was parallel to the Roberto Celemente bridge – or would have been parallel, except his line was curved, due to it only being anchored on one side. Here’s a picture of the bridge, [...]

What is your level of pain from 1 to 10? Zero being no pain at all, and 10 being unbearable pain. It doesn’t specify whether it means physical pain or existential agony. On an unrelated note: 1. Whenever I’m at a restaurant and coffee shop and everyone is being super nice to me, I like [...]

1. For the past couple of months, I’ve been filled with this nagging optimism. The reason: my cat knocked my iPod off the table and busted the shit out of it. It’s 9 months past the warranty and the thing is irreparable (I tried. Fun fact: The battery inside is soft and malleable.). This means [...]

1. I’ve said it before, but I want to say it again, and will probably say it at least seven more times before I die: the language of advertising is completely terrible. That’s not a revelation, I know. But we take it so much for granted. It’s everywhere, and everyone knows that it’s absolutely silly. [...]